The 14 year old controversy


Like most, if not all, I was shocked by the atrocious video spreading across the internet of the fourteen-year-old girl giving a blowjob, and on school grounds at that. Surprisingly, last night I was watching the lifetime movie ‘She’s Too Young’ about 14-year-old kids being overly sexually active. It really brought me out of the naivety of still believing that kids today were in fact kids and not even having such thoughts already.  What a wake-up call did I get when it came to me like a bright light that we’re living in a world so much different from when I was at that age.

First of all, technology has advanced and so has the minds of young people these days. I realized many are bashing this girl and coming down hard on her for doing what she did, not only in public but at school with other boys videoing her. But did it ever cross their minds that these boys have issues too? Actually, when I saw the news and tweets, I couldn’t help but think about her home life and the kind of values instilled in her, if there were any. She has stated that “everyone thinks my mother and father are around,” which clearly signifies to me that they’re both not in the picture and circumstances prevented them from being the kind of parents she needs. She has also expressed her feelings on being suicidal due to the hateful comments AKA cyber bullying coming her way. 

It’s definitely hard to raise kids in today’s society filled with the dreadful pressures of wanting to fit in and be liked by your peers, as well as young girls believing they have to perform “special favors” for a boy to like them. And let’s not ignore the kind of images being portrayed in the media by entertainers. The young teen did say her role models are Kim K and Trina. I know you can’t blame these women for what’s going on with kids today but maybe they can do more to help young girls like the one in this case.

It’ll make sense to enforce the importance of protecting your youth, your innocence. They’re so young and have years to think about stuff like sex so why rush it? Why let it all go before you’re even old enough to drive, much less work full time to earn a decent living? When did kids stop being kids and started exploring life like grown folks? I guess as the world continues to change and the media keeps pushing things in their faces, stuff like this will keep happening when there’s so much influencing their young minds. Still, I hope the girl involved, as well as those boys, receive some sort of counseling ’cause Lord knows they need proper training as to how to treat women appropriately instead of disrespecting them the way they did this girl, but then again sex education doesn’t seem to be working in schools. And I’m sure this is probably going to happen again in the near future and has been happening with kids around the globe. 

By the way, this should not be a trending topic on twitter because it’s only escalating the issue even further and making it more difficult for the parties involved. Adults should be more mature in this situation, instead of encouraging they should be preventing. Grown people should not be googling this video to get off. What’s happening to humanity?

This is just my opinion. What do you think about it?

25 thoughts on “The 14 year old controversy

  1. Dont get me wrong, i’m still with #TeamAmberCole and #stopcyberbullying. I just wish everybody would take a look at their past and see how many bones start poppin out of their closet. #TeamAmberCole

  2. When i heard about Amber, i automatically jumped to her defense. I was all for #TeamAmberCole BUT when i got on Twitter i saw where she wrote “All i need in my life is @RatchetRalph and @Urmomhouse”. She then wrote to @RatchetRalph telling him “please forgive me… I’m sorry.” Then wrote to @Urmomhouse and said ” I miss you baby boy… forgive me.” Now i dont know what the hell is going on in this little f’d up triangle but if she was smart…she wouldnt be writing that stuff.

  3. amber dont have to be ashamed cuz i have a friend dat gave oral sex and amber probably go through peer pressure in school and keep going on wit life dont worry bout wat people think if i were in yo shoes i would sue da boys who put it on da internet but she have to deal wit it for da rest of her life nd dont be ashamed cuz a nineth grader was giving oral sex in da back hallway and another girl was having sex in the boys bathroom

  4. i think all birmingham city schools know about her and i go to woodlawn high school and everybody was talking about all day in every block

  5. . . dhaa way ifeel is dat dahh qurl ainn nun buhtt 14 & dhaa gurll shouldnt even been thinkinn bout sex , butt if datsss dhaa way sheee wanna lett ppl noticee herr, datss her damn business . . & whoo eva posted dat shxt boutt dat qurl needa bee shot n dah damn face , cuss dat shxtt ainn cool , cumm onn na qroww dah f**k . . j/s . > buhttt likee i alwayss say if a muddhafuqkaa cum dis way tawkiinn bout puttin anythanqq dis way n my mouth , imma tell da boyy , ill cut dat bxtch off makee him suck it hisss damn self . . ya feel mee . ????

  6. All over the world teenagers or kids ages12-18 are having sex and doing wat they wanna do..coming up pregnant catching all kinds of diseases and everything else…i dont feel sorry for the young lady cause what she has done isnt anything the porn stars havent done…she should have no shame..wats done is done and aint no take backs..tell me about a child who isnt sexually active…the only people who should be ashamed are the ones who put her on blast..AMBER COLE…JESUS ALREADY DIED AND PAID THE PRICE FOR UR SINS…GOD KNEW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN TO HELP U BECOME A BETTER PERSON AND GROW FROM THIS..DONT KNOW U. BUT I LOVE U AS A CHILD OF GOD AND TAKE CARE…DONT WORRY ABOUT WAT THE NEXT PERSON HAS TO SAY..STRESS KILLS HONEY

  7. she deserves what she gets, but the school should get it to. maybe this will teach her a lesson, if it was my child i would want her to get talked bad to, cause she should know better

  8. i say she shoud keep going n get popular. if she stop now ppl will remembr her and she will have diz on her head 4 a long @zz time. if she keep goin ppl gone be like well she do it alot now so aint shit new.


  10. well i actually think that she put herself in that situation
    for 1 why would you give oral sex outside and behind the school at that
    #2 she should of knew something was up once she seen his friends…
    i dont feel sorry for her and i dont think anybody should because she did it to herself nd she embarrassed not only herself but her parents as well,,,,im not saying what the boys did by filming it was right im saying that they took it to far by putting it on the internet …..they also need to be put in they place….

    1. yeah.. Stace, I agree, but still she still is ah baby man , she still got to learn whats wrong in whats right.. she still got a lot of growing up to dew, SHE SHUD HAVE KNOWN SHIT GONE GO DWN ANYTIME YOU SEE MORE THEN ONE DUDE , im 18 in a mother f****r cant never catch me like that . nevaa, But people making the situation worst , like the ones who aint tryna help or make shIt better i feel like yall need to sdfu! really i feel like honestLY , THE DAAY YOU PUT YO SELF IN AMBER SHOES TATS THE DAY YALL GONE SDFU… (REAL TALK).

    2. I agree with the part where you stated that she set herself up to be in this kind of situation by doing what she did, but the fact that she was even doing something like that at 14 is the bigger issue..she obviously needs to learn how to value herself more and not let boys treat her like that..and like i’ve mentioned about those boys, their parents (particularly mothers) need to teach them how to love and respect a lady.

  11. What needs to be understood is that she did this on her own accord. Whether she knew she was being recorded or not is still up for debate. But regardless of the situation, most people would say that since she’s a child, then she cold have no idea as to what was going on when this happened. Please. If she considers Trina one of her idols, that not only puts the nail in the coffin of her bad taste in music, but it goes to show you that she is trying so hard to get onto some grown woman s**t. Should we sympathize with her? Yes and no. Yes, because poor thing probably didn’t know that was being taped. No, because while she may not have known about the camera rolling, she still knew how to put the dick in her mouth and make that little boy weak in his knees. This debate is going to go on for a minute.

  12. I agree with you. Check out a link to an article I posted on my blog for the secret sex life of kids which shocked me when I read it but is very pertinent to your thoughts

  13. This was sad case.I pray this young girl don’t hurt herself since it’s all over the internet.Im praying for her.

  14. I agree. The video is child porn and anyone who is posting it should be punished. It’s amazing how un-funny it becomes when its someone’s sister or daughter.

  15. People are so childishh for this and entertaining it is not making it better okay its not only bad on amber but it was wrong for them to do her like that but the same people thats siting up bothering her about it is doing it too others just cant see it just rememberr What Goes On In Dah Dark Will Come To The Light ;l

    1. I am glad I did not watch it then. I never even thought to, honestly. Reading about it was just disturbing/upsetting enough.

  16. Hey, I’m glad you posted about this. I saw the whole “leave Amber Cole alone” thing trending on Twitter, but I couldn’t figure out what it was about until now. I agree with you a lot. I’m 22 and my younger sister will be 14 in just a few days and I’m constantly thinking about how different the two of us grew up. It’s really sad, honestly. I remember when I was growing up in the 90’s, you turned on the TV and watched cartoons or went out and rode your bike. Those were things I grew up loving. But now it’s like kids turn on the TV and watch Degrassi and, I’m not bashing those shows, but I was rather SHOCKED when I walked past the TV one day and heard them talking about condoms and going to hotel rooms to have sex with their boyfriends! Seriously, I feel so old when I say this, but when I was that age.. we just didn’t see that kind of stuff. I mean, people were still watching freaking reruns of Hey! Arnold and Spongebob felt like it was just starting to get popular, you know? Ah, it’s crazy. I just feel kinda bad about it all sometimes because, seriously, I love technology as much as the next girl (I’m a licensed computer technician, it’s sorta in my blood xD) but it just seems like, as you said, as technology advances so do the minds of the children in this world today. It seems like that should be a good thing, and I wish it were, but for the most part it just doesn’t seem to be, because kids just aren’t kids anymore 😦

    YIKES I RAMBLED TOO MUCH. This is just a subject that I do feel rather strongly about, though, so I hope it’s okay xP As always, great article, Kai, and I really appreciate your words and thoughts about this and cluing us all in about what that trending topic was about.

    1. Well Im 24 and we did have alot of kid stuff…. But our generation isnt all that innocent either. Im jus sayin I dont remember it being so innocent, different yea but not that innocent. Stephy you say we had sponge bob, and hey arnold I can keep going with the shows wishbone, looney toons, recess. But we also had BET UNCUT, Lil Kim, Trina, Booty shaking videos, Internet Porn. Yea we rode bikes (but where did we ride the bikes too????) We were exposed to some of the same stuff these kids are and doing some of the same things they do. The difference was that we had more of a mind of our own to do the right thing and some one there to help guide us that we actually Listened to. Kids these days either dont have someone around at all to show them right from wrong or they do have someone around and just dont listen. SO stuff like this happens and now a young girl wants to commit suicide. NOOOO im not here to bash the poor lil girl. I honestly feel like this situation should help young people realize how serious these situations are. I work wit kids and I live in texas so it hurts to see this happen. Its funny how she can be known nationally for something like this in a matter of a few days…. but it would take the rest of her life to heal from it. just think about the consequences of your actions no one is bigger than consequences.

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